Tatt's gotta hurt
Don’t you just hate it when you go to the hairdresser with a picture of a famous starlet only to walk out again, an hour or so later, looking more pleb than celeb.
This is the same but like, a trillion times worse. So bad in fact that I can’t help but laugh in an OMG way. Belgian teenager Kimberley Vlaminck – who, might I add, is just 18 – popped along to her local tattoo parlour to have three stars inked next to her left eye. As you do. Daddy paid. Riiiight.
She then fell asleep while pops was outside eating an ice cream – does anyone else think this is all back to front? – only to wake up with 56 black stars across her WHOLE face. I kid thee not – see inset.
Vlaminck is now seeking damages in the thousands claiming that she “cannot go out on to the street, I just look ugly, a freak, mutilated.”
The moral of the story kids: it works for old sexpots like Megan Fox and Angie but us mere mortals? Not so much. (Oh and don’t fall asleep. Ever.)
However if you still want to go ahead and make your mark, perhaps select a tattooist who uses Infinitink. Ten years in the making and just recently gracing our shores, it’s a permanent ink that’s up to three to four times more removable than conventional tattoo ink, surely making it a favourite for those wise guys who opt for tongue tattoos (above) or ‘the one’s’ name. Yes Mr Depp, I’m looking at you.
Developed by Dr Rox Anderson, a Harvard dermatology professor and Dr Edith Mathiowitz, a professor of medical science and engineering at Brown University, Infinitink uses the same technology as microencapsulating medicines in plastic polymers to control the time and rate that the drugs release in the body. The wizz-bang technology traps the dye pigments in microscopic beads coated with safe, biodegradable plastic that’s designed to break open when exposed to heat, thus making it easy to laser off.
Heck it’s all a tad confusing for my uninked mind to take in, but it does have the nod of approval from leading tatt men Brandon Bond, Chris Blinston and Brian Murphy, so go for your lives tatt fans.
So bh-ers, who amongst you is inked? Who feels strongly against it? Tell me all…
Kimberley Vlaminck image credit: telegraph.co.uk